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Thursday, 20 October 2011

my big happy family. :)

dramatic tittle isnt it? sure, sure.. thats what all people want... a peace and happy life.

well, let me tell u about my happy life.:)

-I'm ugliest in the family and i was always been teased by everyone. every member of the family. 
       heck, i dont know if i can take it anymore. i think like my ears had tuned to other signal everytime they started to talk about me. about how i am soooo ugly and fat, how i should looked like.. comparing me to every single person they know.. just everything.  wanna know a secret? the most memorable sentence that i remembered my mom said to me was when i was 13 years old. what is it? "i HATE it to even look at you!" yes... i swear its true. in the middle of uncle and aunt and i saw they grinning as i walked out of the room. not cruel yet? how about forcing me to take diet pills with side effects, excluding me in the costume for bridesmaid of the first grandson wedding, (all of my cousin are glad fully, in the costume), calling me a house maids, just thinking of it made me hate myself. even my mom's mother despise me, calling me too fat and always treat me like shit.

-my own mother treat me differently.
       she treats me as a friend. But wait, u might say that a mother is every girl's best friend, but believe me, its not like that. i thought it was like that, when she accidentally said (she usually called herself mom) "I wanted to go to the market to buy some chicken, do u want to follow me?" she asked me, using the language that she used to use with her friend, i just realize about who I am. thats why she never replied back, when i called her and ended the call with 'love u'. and i thought she was tooo busy. i remebered, not long ago, around 2 months ago, my sister got stomachache, and mom medicate her, applying ointment on her stomach, trust me, she's just a year younger than me, and on the same time, she massage my cousin's head ( she complains that she have headache and sprained her elbow) and gave that cousin advice on how to relieve her ache. but what about me? nothing. nothing happened to me that time. but that night, i get diarrhea  and i throw up dozens of time. I end up crying alone in the toilet, sitting next to the toilet bowl. she even scolded me for eating too much. seriously? i didnt even ate anything that day. where's the nice treatment that she had given to my sister? in the end, i went to my dad's mother and she looked up on my always numb hand and was sorry the fact  that it had been left untreated for a long time. I've complained that to my mom, but, she said i was too fat. that is why the hand went numb. too much fat in it. i laughed my butt off now..

-let me introduce you to my friend, vergil.
      who didnt know vergil? daaaa... he's a character in  my favourite game, Devil May Cry. yeah... I like him. :) he's nice. he even called me whenever i am sad eventhough he had already tired of working all day. he even use his helicopter and visit me in my hostel once. Heck, he even joined my sport day to support me. He was always there for me. Saying that i am out of my mine? i am forever alone girl? maybe. but i am happy when i am with him. i tell him everything about my problem, hugged me when i cried and lay beside me until i want to sleep every night. he always asked me what to cook, listened to the music i sang and encourage me when i fall. he's the best friend i have ever had. where is he right now? well.. he's here with me. sitting with me, and watch as i typed the words.

I think that is all for my family. great huh? owh.. and i am lying on the floor, giving my brother and sister my bed as they will have to go to school tomorrow.. so they will have complete rest and ready for school tomorrow. me? yeah.. i'll be fine on this years old, worn out mattress. no big deal. yup... tomorrow will be a hellisH start of a damned weekend for me. THE LOVELY FAMILY OF MINE IS GOING TO GATHER

good night guys. good night vergil. :)

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